Saturday, March 5, 2011

20110305 - Successful Women (or men)

I sank into the couch last night and couldn’t get up until this morning. I remember lots of good-nights and kisses. I remember, Amber placed a second blanket on me when she learned there is no way mommy is getting up from that sofa. I also remember last night for the first time, Amber massaged my back and arms until I told her to stop without asking for a massage in return.
This morning, I was thinking, this is what a successful woman’s life should be. I picked soap of equilibrium.

Society has a very different description for “successful women”. I was considered as one of them many years ago. I had a life every girl would dream and die for, thus it was deemed to be perfect.

Not I.

I wasn’t with Amber when she first shout out “mommy”; I wasn’t there when Amber stepped forward for the very first time. These moments will never come back, even if I were able experiencing with other children, it will never be the same. These absents are the voids in my life and come back to wound my heart ever so often. Very strangely, indeed, the pain from such emptiness is more severe than the labor itself.  The hollowness can never be filled with wealth of possession in articles.

I believe a true value of life isn’t assessed by computable earnings because it is priceless. One can work for wealth, but wealth can't buy true value of life. I am not wealthy in general society’s term, but I am absolutely wealthier in love, compassion and wisdom. These wealth encourage a balanced livelihood to live for work not work for living.


Thursday, March 3, 2011

20110303 - Just Am...

Today is a happy day and I picked soap of harmony this morning.

Don't know why, but I feel harmony within my body, mind and soul, very peaceful, and nothing mattered.

May be the night yoga I did. May be I finally saw the friend I missed very much today. May be Amber’s kisses and hugs are contagious. May be my mother is in great spirit. May be my students' acceptance of encouragement from yesterday. May be… I don’t have specific reason.

I have been sleeping in cold for three nights; the heater did not work properly. But I am still happy, cold but happy. Don’t know why, just do. I don’t have to have reason to be happy, but I am sure there is something trigger the sensation. The point is not to question why, but feel it with gratitude and awareness. It’s meditation in motion. If not, why do I feel such harmony?

The heater is fixed. I am not happier; I just am content with sense of harmony.

“A heart of joy is a virtue that brings happiness to others like a spring breeze.” – Jing Si Aphorism


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

20110303 - Night Yoga

It is easy to reflect on major mistakes, and hard to eliminate small bad habits.  Before falling into sleep, take the advantage of the power of mind to reexamine the day.  After this is done, with one deep exhalation, let everything go, and reset a positive intention for the new day soon to come.

I never would have thought to do my sadhana before sleep.  My!  It was delicious!!!  I can't wait to share.  I love the sequence I planned.  My muscles are awaken, but not engaged or fully charged up, they are awaken enough to receive complete relaxation.  A great spiritual cleansing, and of course combine with external cleansing with WU compassion to end the day with what I started in the morning.  Oh, I almost forgot, the massage oil from my collections I used in the sequence – yes, I made that too.  :)

Good night! xo


20110302 - the Sun and the Moon

What would you appreciate the most, the light of the moon or the light of the sun?

A wise man said, of course the moon, because it spares the light in the dark so we can see at night.

Do you agree?

A girl ran away from her home after an argument with her mother. It was dark and cold. She was starving. All of sudden she smelled food, it was a noodle shop. She looked through the window for so long, as if the aroma could overcome her hunger. It did not. It made her more eager for food. The owner of the noodle house came out and asked if she would like to come in for a bowl of noodle, she said she wants to, but she turned her pockets inside out, she had no money with her. The man offered her a free bowl of noodle. The girl was very grateful and said in tears, “I don’t know how to repay you for your generosity!” The man was stunned for a moment and replied, “I only cooked one bowl of noodle for you, but I can’t imagine the number of meals your mother has prepared for you!”

The girl realized how awful she had been to her mother, she ran back to her house.

The girl’s mother took her hands and pull her into the house with tears she said, “Where have you been? I was so worry that you’d been hungry and cold.”

The wise man was wrong.

The fact is we all make the same mistake and judgment as the wise man.

We are the sun that has been ignored – perhaps because we refuse to receive the gratitude that we don’t think we deserve, or think being a giver is more honorable than a receiver?

We have also ignored the sun – perhaps because we receive regularly and made belief to be giver’s obligations?

We all know to give, but receiving is just as important to live full and meaningful.

I went to take Ben’s class this morning with this theme in my mind. Then Ben mentioned Cheryl, who passed away last week, had no fear in death. I don’t know Cheryl. The tears of joy came down to honor Cheryl’s graciousness - she lived fully thus death has no effect to her bliss.

I picked soap of comappassion this morning when I woke up to remind myself, while having compassion for others, it is just as important to have compassoin for ourselves.


Tuesday, March 1, 2011

20110301b - Be the Otter Mom - when taking the seat as teacher

I just finished my practice inspired by my theme of the day – determination. Then I received a video from my uncle showing how a mother otter teaches her pup to swim. It reminds me as yoga teacher, how important is our role to the students, like mother otter who is determinate to be passionate and loving to teach her pup(s) to become next great swimming coach.

One of my teachers once said, a true master “creates” more masters. I like to replace creates with inspires and encourages and add become true before the masters.  I am not an English major, but, this is what I believe.

A true master inspires and encourages more become true masters. W.H.Y

If this video violates the copyright, please contact me immediate to remove from this blog.  Thank you. 

20110301 - Determination

As soon as I sent out the invitation letter to view my blog, I started to worry. This morning was even worse. I woke up with so many WHAT IFs. This happens to me all the time. I am very confident at one moment, shortly after I execute my decision I start to find things to doubt myself. What makes worse is I am the one always appears to be optimistic and cheerful. I am going to take moment to explain, not that I don’t worry or get nervous, only just my awareness takes charge fairly quickly. Oh my, I can’t even remember the humor I come up to easy my mind that I thought was great to share.

Now I remember.

As I was taking a shower (for some reason I picked soap of determination this morning), covered with bubbles and drown with concerns, I thought about paintings. Nothing specific, but paintings of females that once caught my eyes when I leisurely walking through the museums in the past, somehow, they all came back this morning. There, I was drawn deeply to artists’ profound abilities of communicating the emotions of the models through their painting tools, not realizing some of the models were probably 100 lbs +/- over weight comparing to today’s standard.

Hope you are laughing now, but seriously, then, I did not complain about how the models looked in the paintings.  What I saw was the allure and the grace that continue to emitting from the paintings throughout the exhibition quarters hundreds years later.

I came back to serenity. Regardless how perfect I want to ensure my work is faultless, the fact is, it is already perfect. At the moment I have determination to put my heart into it, it is a piece of master me.

To all people who concern about their body and their external beauty, your determination of who you are is already within.

With love,

Monday, February 28, 2011

20110228 - Philosophy from A Tortoise

I have been asking why did I decide to take yoga teacher training. In fact I have already been teaching kids yoga even before the training. I love kids and I care, thus I am very careful with my little students. However, when it comes to the grownups, things are not quite the same.  It is fairly easy to still chidlren's phyical excitments, but it is challenge to still one's mind.

Big people as I explain to kids, we start to lose basic instincts, breath as one. The diaphragm breath we knew when we were babies, somehow, we forget; as we grow older, we breathe faster. We cut the prana/chi/air journey in half so we can achieve the speed; like how we achieve social expectations.

As we were babies, we inhale full breath from nostrils to fill up the air in abdominal, thoracic, then clavicular regions and exhale with reverse prana/chi/air journey back to abdominal region to empty out any residual air in the body. The longer breath journey provides stillness, which against social expectations.

I have a sulcata tortoise, named Max. Every time my mother sees “it” (still too young to know the gender), my mother complains about its stillness, because it's boring. But I can ensure you, watching Max quietly walking around the house naturally puts smiles on your face, because its peaceful energy is mightily but steadily and unconsciously spreading around. As a sulcata tortoise, Max has an open home, salad plate is outside the house, everyday it goes toilet in the morning when soaking, takes walk to have its salad twice a day, and strolls around the house then goes back to its home. It completes its tasks given by nature day after day, but not the expectations from my mother or others. As a pet, it doesn’t wiggle its tail, but it breathes lightly and lies quietly with me when I read or resting for a good half hour to an hour even during his napping or playing mood. As a divine soul, it leaves the scene when it learns there is conflicting energy in the air, comes back when all is clear.

May we have learned from Max, to be who we truly are without social expectation, follow the heart; be responsible to the role(s) we are given in this journey, stand still with the truth within; and appreciate the divine soul we already have in us, be kind to ourSelves.

"Learn to remain undisturbed in the tumult of people and events. Remain at peace within even when busy and occupied." - Jing Si Aphorism


P.S. A fun fact to share, tortoise has been one of four respected spiritual animals in traditional Chinese folklores and the only one that exists in real life.

20110227 - King's Speech

The theme for the fourth practice teach was assigned about three weeks ago. We were suppose to come up a theme from the movie "King's Speech".

Before the coronation, Duke of York found out Lionel is not certified therapist and was very angry and disappointed at him. Then Lionel explains he began his profession by treating shell-shocked soldiers in WWI and found that in order to cure them completely, the mechanicals of the treatment was not enough, he must go DEEPER.

This is where I found my connection as yoga teacher as well as a student.

I told my students that day, whether there is already a Lionel in them or at that moment I am Lionel, the gate in the hearts must be opened before searching of the King can begin, and all the conflicts ahead of us are here to enable us to stay equilibrated. We must face the conflicts. When we do, the conflicts transform to positive opposing energy that would create lightness and joy through our journey of seeking the King.

King is the metaphor for our inner Self, the truth, the divine soul. It has been buried by many small selves that represent obstacles in life. The illusions of CAN’Ts, WHAT IFs, etc are the obstacles that blocking the truth within us.

     Duke of York: Because I have right to be heard. I have voice!
     Lionel Logue: [pauses] Yes, you do.

Yes, you do. We all do. We are already the King.

Many seek illumination (the King) by lighting up a lamp, not knowing the true light is already within.

May we all turn on the light within in this journey we share. 


20110218 - Roads

In this journey we have been on several paths by choice or not, some smooth and some rough. Whether the roads are smooth or rough, always be grateful to the people who pave the way before us. Even on the rough roads, with perseverance and courage they can be leveled off. I like to hike on more challenge trails, even though I might have to be extra cautious because the unknown obstacles ahead, but I often find the views are much more breath taking and easier to notice the subtle beauty along the walkway. I would stop looking at a unique shape of rock that blocks my way with leaves rising from the crack, or I see a tree frog in the middle of the road watching me as if we are in competition of persistence who would make the first move.

Without hardship in life, we cannot fully understand the truth nor develop our full potential; with awareness, you will see hidden treasures within each challenge.

Enjoy your roads with whistles ~ W.H.Y


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